Symbiosis
by TheMusicLives
Summary: She had missed him. He had missed her. Neither wanted to jeopardize the balance they'd found together. POST-TLJ, MULTI-CHAPTER, REYLO, IN-PROGRESS
1. Prologue

A/N: Hello, first time caller, long time listener… I've been writing FanFiction for many years, but this is my first time dipping my toe into the Star Wars waters. I hope it's warm.

While I've never written Star Wars, I've been in the fandom for many years as I was a fan of the Extended Universe books, in addition to loving the movies and the Knights of the Old Republic games. Here's hoping I don't screw this up royally because I would hate to do that. If I do, just blame Reylo… they've got my brain tied up in knots. Also, I am a tad bit rusty.

 **WARNING: THIS IS UNBETA'D. MY MISTAKES ARE THE ONLY THING I OWN. THE REST BELONGS TO LUCASFILM/DISNEY, ALONG WITH MY STAR WARS LOVING HEART.**

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 ** _Symbiosis_** _[sim-bee-oh-sis_ _] NOUN:_ _The living together in intimate association or close union of two dissimilar organism;_ _interaction between two different organisms living in close physical association, typically to the advantage of both._

* * *

Rey was miserable, and she wasn't supposed to feel this way.

Since fleeing Crait aboard the Millennium Falcon, Rey had been constantly surrounded by people. So much of her life she had been secluded from others and now they were everywhere she went inside of the tiny, crowded freighter. Friends and new acquaintances were talking to her constantly as they trekked through the star-filled universe in search of asylum, telling her that they owed her a debt for her role in their rescue. Among them she was a part of a make-shift family, all striving towards a common goal.

She'd never been so needed and appreciated and, yet, she had never felt more alone. Her nerves were jagged with unrest and she was beginning to feel that she might suffocate if she didn't find some time by herself to just breathe.

Eventually they'd found refuge on a long-forgotten planet called Dantooine, another one of those grassy places that she'd never dared to imagine back when all that surrounded her was sand. This place contained sparkling lakes of cool waters and a temperate climate that stood in such drastic contrast to her long-time home of Jakku that she found it difficult to believe it was real.

One breath of the aromatic air and she'd taken off running, impatient to find some solace. Trying to flee from the stifling feeling of the nomadic throng who only made her feel more isolated, Rey had headed off in a random direction and only stopped when her lungs felt that they'd give out from the effort.

She'd come to the edge of a cliff, one that overlooked a vast plain of swaying green grasses, and fell to her knees in exhaustion. Once she'd taken a moment to recharge she leaned back to rest, sitting down in the dirt, her hands on either side of her gripping the earth beneath her, trying to find an anchor for her swirling thoughts.

Reaching out through the Force she focused on the energy buzzing around her, the life she could feel blanketing this planet helping her fractious spirit feel slightly more even and centered. She allowed herself to fill up with the harmony that the nature enveloping her projected, reaching deep into the core of the planet in search of the stability she had been craving.

Then a presence slammed into her consciousness, bringing with it the equilibrium she had been so desperately seeking. And she cried out in shear relief before she could stop herself.

She had missed him.

* * *

Kylo Ren was now the Supreme Leader of the First Order, yet inside he felt hollower than he'd ever thought possible.

Since letting the remainder of the Resistance slip through his fingers on Crait he'd been distracted at best and disinterested at worst. The only thing that his hard-won power had brought him was apathy.

General Hux would begrudgingly come to him for instructions, or with information on where they thought the Resistance had fled, and the only emotion Ren could muster was a modicum of amusement at just how much Hux hated answering to him. Ren couldn't feel anger or hatred or fear for those he'd once tracked with conviction.

He couldn't feel anything.

He couldn't focus on hunting down their prey with the same fervor that he had before. It didn't matter anymore that they'd escaped alive now that he'd seen her hope for him leave her eyes.

He'd lost something much more important than a war.

After sending Hux on his way with a half-hearted approval to pursue a lead they'd uncovered, Ren retreated to his own quarters to escape the questioning stare of those who witnessed his indifference. Those he commanded had noticed his temper had been more subdued of late and it was only a matter of time before Hux took advantage of his weakness. Once Hux discovered his recent detached demeaner meant that his Force abilities were no longer as formidable as they had been with his darker passions to fuel them, it was only a matter of time before the ambitious man led a coup.

And Supreme Leader Kylo Ren couldn't bring himself to care about that either.

At least he didn't have to pretend in his own space. He didn't even have to put on the mediocre façade that he'd surrounded himself with lately; he could just revel in the fact that he felt nothing. The cold metal around him was as stark and unyielding as his soul felt.

The turmoil that had ruled so much of his life was now gone, stolen by one disheartened glance and a slammed door.

Removing his armor and gloves, he sat on the floor at the foot of his bed with the intent to meditate. His hands flat against the cool floor, he attempted to reach out through the Force to find meaning for his current dispassionate state. Just as he begged the Force for guidance he felt a presence grasp ahold of his wandering plea and a forgotten warmth filled his chest.

He had missed her.

* * *

They sat beside each other in their solitude, eyes forward, neither saying a word aloud. His presence had restored her peace, hers had returned his deeply passionate nature. Both felt profound contentment because the other was near.

Neither wanted to jeopardize the balance they'd found by breaking the spell with words.

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A/N: This is a multi-chapter story and I have already written a good portion of it. I'm hoping to get it posted over the next several days. Please let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter One

A/N: Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed last time. Each comment is greatly appreciated. Now let's make these adorable dummies talk to each other!

 **WARNING: THIS IS UNBETA'D. MY MISTAKES ARE THE ONLY THING I OWN. THE REST BELONGS TO LUCASFILM/DISNEY, ALONG WITH MY STAR WARS LOVING HEART.**

* * *

Rey was never surer that he had chosen the wrong path than when he appeared to her this way. The tranquility his spirit brought her was mirrored in his own mind, which proved to her that working together was the best course for them to take. Right now, even though he was physically lightyears away, she could feel his presence as if he was close enough to touch.

Then she remembered that they _could_ touch.

Rey's hand relaxed its grip on the ground beneath her and Ren's hand shifted slightly, moving a hair closer so that his fingertips would brush hers. The connection between them thrummed with satisfaction at the skin-to-skin touch. They both kept their eyes ahead.

Words were unnecessary for a time as the Force shimmered with all the emotions they shared just beneath the surface.

He had the chance to do the right thing, to leave with her, but he hadn't. Her anger over his refusal had cooled and simmered into sorrow. She saw her thoughts reflected in his mind over her inability to join him as he'd asked. He was just as bereft as she felt.

They were on opposite sides of a war, with two different beliefs. She wished for the millionth time that the Force had connected her mind to anyone else, yet she knew she wouldn't let him go if she had the choice. He knew how it felt to be abandoned, to be alone, to be _so_ _lonely_ and she finally knew what it felt like to have someone who understood her. The camaraderie she found in his mind was something that she could cherish, something that was _hers_.

But if she couldn't agree with him and he couldn't agree with her, then his proximity should bring her anything other than the serenity she currently felt at his side.

After reveling in the contentment found in each other for much longer than should have been feasible between two assumed enemies, she took a deep breath and shattered their peaceful meditation by breaking the silence without moving a muscle other than those in her mouth. "We're not supposed to feel like this… we can't."

"I know," was his only reply, his tone tightly controlled and even. She could feel that he understood her, even though she hadn't been very articulate. And she also felt that he wasn't ready to explore what it meant.

Rey didn't know why they were connected, how they were connected, or _what the Force_ was going on between her and Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. There were no myths about links like this that she'd heard of and she didn't have the first idea as to how to explain it if someone had asked her. She knew that Snoke claimed to be responsible for it, but as corrupt as he was she couldn't be sure what to believe. Rey was lost when it came to why they could communicate like this and he was the only one she knew that might have some insight. And with the turmoil in her mind, the rollercoaster of emotions that she was riding due to her undefined feelings for the man sitting next to her, she had to know as much as she could.

So, she started with a question she hoped would be less controversial than their confusing feelings. "If Snoke created this… thing… between us, wouldn't it have disappeared when he died?" Her words were clumsy, but they would do. It was the first question that popped into her mind.

There was a deep, weary sigh next to her, like he expected this question but wished she'd ask it at another time. "This shouldn't come as a surprise, but Snoke was an accomplished liar." He snorted in derision, the apprehension he felt about this subject rumbling just beneath the surface of his thoughts. "I doubt he had much to do with this… bond. If anything, he sensed that our conversations were happening and then planted the visions for manipulation purposes. To use our weaknesses against us."

She considered that possibility briefly, unable to believe how complicated her life had become in such a short amount of time. While she had recently been through many situations she could never have imagined, nothing vexed her like this connection between them.

Not connection, bond... At least _he_ knew what to call it. It was more than what she could come up with.

The things that were possible through the Force amazed her every day, but what it could do to the mind was a continuous source of confusion. That the Force could bond her mind to someone else's for some unknown purpose seemed well beyond the realm of what should be possible. As untrained as she was, she was completely in the dark on this subject; Rey needed Ren to turn on the light if she was going to understand what was transpiring between them.

"Then _why_ is this happening?" She ignored the discomfort wafting from him and continued to press him, without looking at him; if she looked at him she might lose her courage. "Why now? Why us?"

He was quiet for a moment, as if hoping she'd interpret his silence as a deterrent and give up this line of questioning for now. When the lull stretched on he relented and spoke delicately: "There was a prophecy: 'Darkness shall rise, and Light to meet it.' My _former_ master thought it meant you and I were destined to fight for dominance." His tone turned sardonic, "But we both know he's been wrong before."

Rey knew he was referring to the moment that Ren used his grandfather's lightsaber to end Snoke's life while he was bragging that he was in complete control. While she had never been so glad that someone was wrong, Ren must still be coming to terms with his actions if he couldn't put words to them. After being under someone's thumb for so long, he must feel disoriented about so violently removing his master's influence. She had felt similarly unsettled when she first escaped Jakku.

She turned her hand over in an attempt to offer comfort, her palm now facing upward, and he took it fully in his hand when he sensed her intent, his fingers wrapping securely around hers. Her previous refusal to take his hand was forefront in both their minds as their skin hummed with enthusiasm at each other's touch.

"I remember Snoke mentioning that…" She recalled Snoke had shared that information shortly before he died. Sighing, she timidly asked, "And what do _you_ think it means?"

He cleared his throat, his unease flowing freely between them. "The archives from the Empire contained comprehensive records from the Jedi Order, which I spent some time studying. There's reference to an older prophecy that stated a chosen one would be born and bring balance to the Force. At one time it was thought that Anakin Skywalker would fulfill that prophecy." His words sounded more unsure the more he said. "Our talks… our bond… make me think that the two prophecies might be associated… somehow."

He seemed afraid to voice his suspicions aloud, so she summarized for him: "So, it's likely that this mind game is the Force trying to balance itself through _us_ because _you're_ related to Darth Vader."

"Possibly." He drawled, then paused for a beat. "It might explain why this bond materialized and why this link continues to occur when neither of us know how to trigger it."

In other words, they were being drawn together by the will of the Force and there was nothing they could do to stop it.

His theory sounded plausible. As the only one between them that had any formal Force training, she had hoped for more from him with regards to a solution. The fact that he was as clueless as she was about how to avoid these intimate connections, and the tentative feelings that were growing within them, was disconcerting. There was a very real chance she would have to face him in battle and her attachment to him was only getting stronger.

She sighed heavily to vent her vexation, hoping that he didn't sense the direction of her thoughts. "The Force has very inconvenient timing."

His reply was soft, husky and low. "I agree."

She shifted and looked at him for the first time since they'd appeared to each other today, no longer able to keep that particular wall between them. She was relieved that his mask wasn't present, his raven hair oddly still in the breeze she could feel ruffling her own tresses. He turned his head to meet her gaze when he felt that observation float through her mind, his expressive eyes dark and wary of her scrutiny.

He looked stoic and just as tired as she felt. Like he was just as unhappy with their circumstances as she was and just as helpless to change them. She'd never seem him look so melancholy.

"I wish things were different," she stated, gently, gripping his hand a little tighter in hers. "But I still can't join you."

"I know," he disclosed, his expression kind and sad. "We can't abandon our principles just because this connection is trying to confuse us."

She allowed his words to wash over her, his substantial lack of conviction echoing through the Force. It was plain to Rey that he was only saying what he felt he had to, as if he had no alternative to the path stretched out before him. Like he was given no other option.

Reading his demeanor was so easy when they were connected like this. She briefly wondered if he'd been this unsure when he offered her a galaxy to rule. It was obvious to her that she had to take this opportunity to confront him. She drew on the strength his closeness gave her to challenge him.

"You could walk away," she replied pointedly, her determined eyes never leaving his. "But you _won't_."

His astonishment reverberated through the air around them, indignation coloring his features. He leaned into her space, the change in angle causing his dark hair to shadow his face. She was momentarily tempted to brush it away from those haunting eyes, which were filled with anguish.

"How can you _still_ think that it's my choice, Rey?! _There is no choice_." The emphasis he put on his last four words caused her to tremble in frustration.

His impassioned response fueled her certainty that she was supposed to confront him about this. She wouldn't let him intimidate her from trying to expose his true mindset. Everything inside her told her this was too important. She got up on her knees and leaned towards him, refusing to back down from the fight. Now he was so close she could feel his breath brush her cheek as Ren vigorously inhaled and exhaled in his outrage.

"I know there's still a choice, Ben." She watched in fascination as his given name from her mouth tempered his irritation, his features less constricted and severe than before. "Our connection tells me just how miserable you are right now; you can't hide it from me. I _know_ you're far from where you're meant to be, and I'm convinced that you can still be saved from the path you've chosen for yourself." She paused, leaning forward even further, closing the slim distance between them to rest her forehead against his. "You're conflicted, and I'm incredibly stubborn, so I'm not going to stop trying to talk you out of what you've _decided_ you must do."

"So, you've deluded yourself into thinking I'm worth saving?" He asked the question lowly, his voice thick with some elusive emotion she didn't dare give a name. His eyes were downcast, his shame filling the air between them as he pulled back and turned his head away from her to stare at something in the distance that she couldn't see. " _No one_ wants to save the monster, Rey." His voice had caught on the word _monster_ just as the last time he had referred to himself that way. His tone was flat and lifeless, like he couldn't believe he had to remind her.

The self-disdain in his voice made Rey want to do or say whatever it was that would make him understand his significance to her.

"Apparently, _I do_ , Ben."

His head snapped back towards her, his glossy eyes roaming her face as if they were looking for an indication that she'd been less than truthful. He seemed lost as to how he was supposed to respond to her sentiment, his silence in the face of her declaration evidence of that fact.

All he did was openly stare at her, at a loss for words.

She studied his face, wrapped in bewilderment. Unsure as to when it changed, she no longer saw him as the monster he was convinced he was. Now, to her, he was someone to be protected and comforted. Someone who needed her to help him see his worth, to fill him with the hope that he'd been denied for so long. She needed to show him that she cared for him, but she wasn't sure how to do so without destroying any chance she had at protecting her own heart.

Their intense stare stretched out for several moments as they regarded each other. It wasn't long before a delicious shiver ran down her spine as some very forbidden emotions started to simmer beneath the surface, electrifying the air between them. She could feel his bafflement shift to curiosity, then evolve into the hot ache of longing. Inside she could feel a tangible yearning blossom in her throat, reflecting the fire now blazing in his eyes.

The current of the Force around them started to swirl and loop with excitement, encouraging this strange development in their view of each other as her pulse began to race.

The spell was broken when he abruptly backed away and turned his head forward at the exact moment she felt the air around them start to sizzle with hunger. "What does your view look like?" His voice was deep and throaty, almost hoarse with the effort to sound like he'd been unaffected. "Wherever you are?"

It wasn't a very subtle subject change.

She took a few steadying breaths in an attempt to calm herself and glanced ahead to the horizon as he had, resuming her seated position on the ground next to him while hugging her knees to her chest with the hand that wasn't holding his. Her answer wouldn't reveal her location, so she told him: "It's a sunset. A rather beautiful one."

Her heart was still pounding in her chest, but she was relieved that his uncharacteristic self-control had saved them from what could have happened. She'd previously thought it would be impossible to make their situation worse. Now she knew that she had been _very_ wrong about that.

She turned back to study his pensive profile, hoping that the uncomfortable moment had passed even though she could still feel his unrest bubbling inside his mind. "What's do _you_ see?"

His eyes remained straight ahead, his voice steadier than it had been but still shaky. "Stars… Always stars."

"Sounds like you're due for a change of scenery." She could feel his unwillingness to face her just yet, his determination to keep himself in check. Rey realized he was struggling more than she had, no matter what his outward appearance showed her. She tried to project a calming warmth to him, to show him that he wasn't alone.

"Maybe," he replied gruffly.

With that last word he slowly extracted his hand from hers and faded away as soon as their hold was interrupted. It seemed that he'd discovered how to end a connection, even if he hadn't determined what brought them on.

She felt his absence deeply, unrest once again eclipsing her soul.

* * *

The instant that Rey faded away Ren slammed his bare palms on the stone floor, the masochistic sting traveling through his nerves and rattling him out of his self-imposed trance. His breathing was labored and uneven as he hung his head, pressing his chin to his chest in an attempt to control his alarm over what he'd just prevented.

Did she know what she was doing to him?

Her quiet words, silky with promise. The way she could read his inner turbulence and had stretched out with her mind to sooth his spirit. Her assurances that he _wasn't_ lost, that she would stop at _nothing_ to save him… it was almost his undoing. He'd almost reach over to her and pulled her against his chest, given in to the desire to feel her heart pounding against his own. He'd almost escalated this bizarre game to a level they wouldn't recover from.

He'd almost showed her just how much he wished her words could be true.

Almost.

She'd been absolutely right when she called this a mind game; the Force was being completely transparent about it's intentions for them, if what almost happened was any indication. Her innocent viewpoint on the subject was right on target, even though she couldn't sense how accurate she was in her conclusion. He wished he could be just as unaware of just how difficult it was going to be to fight this.

Just before he gave into his craving to hold her he detected the will of the Force drawing them together and it gave him the fortitude to push her away before it was too late. It was the only thing that kept him from succumbing to the pressure he felt inside his chest, the one that drew him to her like a man gone too long without water is drawn to a well.

He wanted her _so_ badly right now. He was sweating around his hairline, the moisture slowly dripping down his neck and disappearing under the collar of his tunic. His physical response to her had taken him by total surprise in the moment. She was suddenly irresistible where she'd only been an attractive curiosity before. He knew that his feelings for her ran much deeper than he dared to admit, but he'd truly believed they were unrequited once she refused to take his hand and join him.

Now he had to entertain the idea that she might be just as emotionally-involved as he was. And he wouldn't let that thought give him hope.

She'd been so stunning, sitting next to him with her gaze hazy and her hair whipping in the wind around her. A soft blush blooming in her cheeks and neck as her eyes searched his for the answer to some unspoken question. Her mouth was tinted a darker shade of pink than he remembered, probably thanks to the sunset she'd mentioned, and the effect made it even more tempting. Especially after she had unconsciously wet those lips with her tongue while the desire-induced fever was coming over her, drawing her to him.

He let out an exasperated breath, walking his arms forward and stretching out his legs until his toes and fingers were suspending his body over the floor. He lowered himself and pushed up with a grunt, before repeating the action over and over as quickly as he could. The muscles in his arms and legs soon began to ache with the effort and he let that sensation fill his mind, trying to erase the scorching desire that still fogged his brain. He went on like this until his lungs burned and his body collapsed back to the cool tile beneath him, where he caught his breath before sitting up again.

He couldn't let this happen; he just couldn't allow this to go on. If they followed this path to each other it was only going to cause her pain in the end. He had to endure her agony when he brought her to Snoke and he refused to be the reason for it again. He couldn't bear it.

The bond was only growing stronger with time; he could feel it with each occurrence, the way her inner musings were easier to decipher the more time their minds spent connected. And the more they talked and understood each other, the more dangerous it would be for them both. It was for her own benefit that she admits defeat in this crusade for his soul and lets her hope for him dissipate again.

Her aspiration to save him was very endearing, but he had to disabuse her of this notion that he could be turned, no matter what the cost. And with someone as determined and alluring as Rey… he wasn't certain he could withstand her resolve as well as fight against the will of the Force.

He feared that he would have to do something drastic to make her give up on him and his heart ached at the thought.

Oh, he wouldn't deny that it would hurt him to push her away, to lose the light she brought to him when he thought he was beyond it, but he couldn't care about that. His only thought was of how to protect her from himself.

Reaching out through the energy around him, he drew the coldness of space into his heart, searching for the numbness her presence had cured. It was better for them both if he forgot just how alive she could make him feel.

Apathy was safer than hope when you were falling in love with the enemy.

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A/N: Turned out much longer than I expected... Please leave me a note if you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!


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